Jun 302008

Pitchfork Gives Music 6.8

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My good friend Dingel sent me a link to this Onion article ages ago, but I just stumbled back across the link to it whilst cleaning out my inbox: Pitchfork Gives Music 6.8.

Money Quote:

semi-favorable review, which begins in earnest after a six-paragraph preamble comprising a long list of baroquely rendered, seemingly unrelated anecdotes peppered with obscure references, summarizes music as a “solid but uninspired effort.”

“Coming in at an exhausting 7,000 years long, music is weighed down by a few too many mid- tempo tunes, most notably ‘Liebestr√§ume No. 3 in A flat’ by Franz Liszt and ‘Closing Time’ by ’90s alt-rock group Semisonic,” Schreiber wrote. “In the end, though music can be brilliant at times, the whole medium comes off as derivative of Pavement.”

(Hat tip to Dingel and the Onion)

Feb 272008

International Make up a Word Day

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The great Scalzi has declared today to be International Make up a Word Day. Far be it from me to resist such a decree, my contribution is “pitchforkate”. It means to write about music in a bloviating and self-congratulatory manner.

In a sentence: “Man, that guy totally pitchforkated his way through that review of the new Radiohead album.”

Of course, other forms (e.g. the noun “pitchforkation” or the adverbial “pitchforkatingly”) are also acceptable.